My Audience Liked It

On Tuesday, I gave a speech in my speech class (imagine that) on my pet peeves. Since I wanted to be a little more creatice, I named it "Things That Piss Me Off." I got a pretty good glare from my teacher but that was it. My pet peeve was When People Don't Know How To Do Things, But Do Them Anyway.

I started out with a reference to Napoleon and Hitler. I stated that they didn't know how to dress warm when he attacked Russia. Napoleon went up there, "I've got a great idea! I've got a great idea! OH! It's a bit cold! It's a bit cold!" He lost thousands of troops to the cold. Then Hitler, 100 years later, went up, "I've got a better idea! I've got a better idea! AHH! It's the same idea! It's the same idea!" He lost a few million troops.

I slid into the main point of my speach after that with, "The same things happen today but on a less… world wide scale. Some people are so dense that they try and do things that they don't know how to do and just create more work and more frustration for those around them."

I really don't feel like typing my whole speech, so I'll just post my outline which is already typed and good to go.

I Video Games:
A) Vehicles
1 What normally happens: Cliff Diving
2 Calling a vehicle
3 There’s a tutorial
4 Every time you get in, a help tab pops up
5 People are better than you
B) Team Killing
1 Just pisses people off
2 Probably aren’t good enough to kill the enemy
3 Return fire: vote to ban
II At Work:
A) Tickets
1 A few people have been trained
2 People who haven’t been trained did it
3 “Nobody But Managers”
B) Taking tickets
1 Not hard, take tickets, put in bucket, repeat number to customer
2 Set the scale, instructions on front
3 Mental math is not hard, especially when everything is in multiples of 5
C) Lazertag
1 Again, only a few people have been trained
2 Vests are getting broken
3 Vests are out of place

III Driving:
A) You’ve all seen them
1 Drivers cutting you off
2 Not doing the speed limit
3 Lack of blinker
B) Today’s Black Plague
1 Everywhere
2 At school

I got quite a few good laughs out of the whole speech. I pulled from Lewis Black's comedy style and did the angry voice and some stuff like that. I of course built on each of those points and talked about them individually. My teacher even laughed at some of the things. I got a 98 out of 100 on it, so I'm really happy.

When My Friend Becomes President

After I got home from the mountain last night I started working on Number One's campaign video. The video has reashed a level of awesome that is unknown to the rest of mankind. Everyone running for president has already set up some kind of campaign thread in the forums. The will have no idea what hit them. A comeback of this quality from complete silence is sure to knock them the fuck out! The other candidates probably think that Number One has just given up on the campaign, then they get hit with this masterpiece. I'm going to blow their minds. As Number One's Public Relations manager, I'll be in charge of all campaign duties and publications. I'm thinking that I will set up some sort of questioning session inside gamertag's VB Chat. I want to make this whole thing as rediculously official as possible. When in the VB chat, I'll make everyone be super respectful and refer to him only as Mr. One. If hey don't do that, I'll have him completely ignore the question and I'll yell at the person to be quiet and respectful.

The video took me about an hour to edit and put together. It was origionally a campaign video that my friend David used in his American Government class. I thought it was perfect for this whole thing. I got it from him and just changed a few names so it fit to this purpose. It really has nothing to do with the site but it does gnaw at your soul. All the old PSA's fit together and changed from their origional message to something that means nothing. I think some people will cry after watching it.

Since Galen doesn't live anywhere near me, I can play off the fact that he's not in the movie due to location of the shooting. My friend David says "My Administration," I'll just say that he was playing the part of Galen. You have to watch the movie for yourself to really understand how awesome it is.

The Vid

Just Another Tuesday... But Not Really

Throughout this entry, my state of mind changes from pretty drunk to black out to just odd ramblings. I’m really glad I decided to type all this while I was drunk. I don’t remember most of these thoughts or actions, but they were on my laptop when I woke up in the morning. So, here it goes; Weekend Stories! And remember, I was drunk for this, I don’t actually remember much of it.

Alright, I’m really fucked up right now, just about the most fucked up I’ve ever been. The only reason I don’t seem fucked up at all is because I ran spell check before I posted this. Right now, I’ve drank almost a fifth of Goldschläger… which is awesome alcohol by the way. It tastes of hot tamales/cinnamon. So, a little while ago, Amy and David started to cuddle on the lazy boy. I knew what was going on, so I courteously started wandering about the cabin so I wouldn’t disturb them. They headed upstairs and I stayed downstairs like a good friend would. Later on, David came downstairs; we had a quick discussion about how much I trusted him and how much I loved Amy (the friend type of love. I actually have never contemplated dating her.) After a few minutes, we headed upstairs to find her lying on the bathroom floor next to the toilet in a pool of her own vomit. Being a Lifeguard and a trained professional, I immediately moved her into the recovery position and just talked to her to make sure she was still breathing / alive. After a while/right now, I went downstairs to the other bathroom to pee and to get something more to drink… I hear loud noises… I need to check on her… brb… I found out what the noises were. It was David panicking because she started to vomit again. I kept her reassured that I was there and that I was a trained professional, which I am by the way. I sat and talked with David and talked for a while. David puked from alcohol for the first time in his life (he’s Irish.) I only came back down to check the time and to finish this paragraph. I’m heading back upstairs to tell David that it’s only midnight. He will be disappointed in himself.

So, David and I moved Amy to a bed and watched over her for a bit. She was rank of vomit so David had to keep his distance or else he would vomit. I held her on her side so she wouldn’t choke on her own vomit. David said he needed to lie down, so he did… and passed out. I changed Amy’s shirt… I didn’t look. I gave her my own. Her sweatshirt was covered in vomit, and I was dry. Last thing I want it for her to be covered in her own vomit. There is a towel under her head just in case. I came down to get my drink and to update this. I will try and update it as much as possible. I’m going back upstairs now, Total Amy vomit count: 3. Total Dave vomit count: 1 (cause of the smell) Total Casey vomit count: 0!

I’ve been watching Amy for about an hour now, and she hasn’t thrown up. Which is why I think she’ll be fine. But Then again, I’m more fucked up than when I started this blog. The only reason I’m conscious right now is because I refuse to sit or lay down. I’m watching someone. I have to stay awake. I must stay awake. She relies on me to stay awake and survive. By the way, I’m not going to remember this story, so I’m glad I’m typing it right now. Cause I can tell that I’m swaying back and forth.

I am so drunk right now that I should NOT be in charge of two dunk people. David is passed out. Amy is passed out. I have the hiccups. I brought the bottle of Goldschläger up with me and I’m even more drunk than before. I wanted to watch the movie “Strange Brew” but I’m too drunk to start again. I need to go back upstairs now to check on the others. I don’t think that lifeguard training would help at this point….

It is now 1:30 in the morning and I am fucked beyond belief. Amy is responding, she’s Ok. David is also responding. That means he’s OK too! Which is a giant plus. Since I’m trashed. I see a toaster, I’m going to try and find bread…

I have just searched every cabinet in the house for some bread and all are empty. Unless someone wants to put some effort into searching, I give up

I just checked everyone else, and they seem fine. They will definitely make it through the night whether or not I pass out. I shut my eyes for a millisecond and my property value has already sky rocketed. I suggest that you let the property folk speak first and then build off of what they say. If they don’t say much, buy what is available as quick as possible so that other companies don’t try to jump in on it.

PASS OUT

The Morning After:
I have no idea when I typed all that. We just read it and it’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. I woke up to Dave and Amy talking downstairs and heard them talking about me. I answered and came down. I don’t remember half the stuff that happened in the story and Amy doesn’t remember anything. David just went out to get my long johns and shirt since Amy had my old one and I don’t really know where it is anymore. She says it’s “over there” and pointed in a general direction to my left. I just got my mom’s voicemails from last night. I forgot to call her and tell her that I was still alive. Well, I’m still drunk and we’re getting ready to go skiing. It should be a great day. The only reason I don’t have a hangover is because I’m still drunk. I’ll get back to this soon.

Amy is still drunk and lying on the floor. I just gave her some water and she sat up. We’re trying to get ready but it’s not really working. We’re going now, time to put on the boots.

Just got back from snowboarding. It was pretty radtastic. Snow was awesome the first couple hours we were there but kind of warmed up and became sticky later in the day. We stopped for lunch and I felt like I was really really hungry… apparently a lot too much. We were sitting there laughing and talking about the night before when I started feeling a little nauseous. I threw up in a garbage can out front while Amy and David sat there laughing at me… bastards. I threw up about 10 dollars worth of food! It sucked!

Now that we’re back at the cabin, we’re picking up the damage from last night, I’m not cleaning the vomit… wasn’t mine. I tallied the vomit count… these results aren’t official yet, but my tally was Amy: 3, Dave: 1, Casey: 1 the next day.

Just got home. I’m exhausted, and hungry. I can’t seem to keep food down at all. I think I’m getting bulimia. David said I should just stop eating altogether, since anorexia is cheaper than bulimia. I’ve thrown up about $20 worth of food today. The Official Vomit Count is Amy: 3, Dave: 1, Casey: 2. none of mine was from alcohol…

My overall thoughts on this trip: Awesome! It couldn’t have gone any better in my opinion. Now we know Amy’s limits and will happily disregard them next time. I think that was the best Tuesday of my entire life.

Foriegn Relations From The Home Country

Last night was the AFS banquet. Since I'm the treasurer of my school International Relations Club (IRC), I had to be there. I did my duty and went, sat, watched a few foriegn kids tell us who they were, where they were from and so on. One of the foriegn girls actually happened to be quite hot... She's from Norway.. My family is from Norway, I'm 100% Norse. Awesome! I have a conversation starter! Instead of the regular one with exchange students "where ya from?" Well, found out her name is Henrietta, and so on. I kinda lost interest in her when all she did was talk about guys from the school she went to. I talked to some other exchange students and then decided that I wanted to ride my longboard.

Just before I went outside, another officer from IRC came up to me and told me she was leaving and that I had to stay to take care of anything that IRC had left.... Fuck That. They ditched me once at the pool party, I'm not staying. So I told them I would stay and promptly left. Walked out the door right behind them, didn't even wait for them to leave. They saw me open my car door and pull out my longboard. I started riding on the hill that goes into the parking lot and noticed that there was someone else there riding a longboard! yay! I even know him! I talked to the two guys for quite some time before I remembered the ULTIMATE HILL. They were willing to drive if I was willing to show them the hill. I happily obliged. We got there, it's at the end of the main stretch that goes through my town. I told my friend to get out and grab his board, but he chickened out. I did the first run on my own. The car followed a little behind me to give me some light since it was dark out. he said he got up to 30 mph going down the hill... AWESOME! I jumped in the car, we drove to the top and told my friend to get his board and he did this time.

We started down the hill and saw headlights coming the other way... fuck.. looks like this one will be a straight shot... no carving back and forth to slow down. I am loving the speed and actually tuck to go faster, about half way, I turn and look back to yell at my friend, "This is where it gets fast!" and he gave me a look of sheer horror. I reach the bottom of the hill and look back, my friend has the worst case of speed wobble I think I have ever seen in my life, and we're going 34 mph. Somehow, he manages to keep in together untill we reach the bottom of the hill and slows down. We stop, our ride pulls up, we get in, he looks at me and says, "You are fucking insane, and I hate you for making me do that."

I did the hill twice more after that.

Another Case Of The Mondays

It was that day of the week again, Monday. It was actually exceptionally good for a monday. Nothing really all that special happened, but it was just a good day. I had to work right after school, which is OK since my school is literally 20 yards from my work. Well, at work on monday, I spent almost the entire night talking to my coworker Chad about World War 2 and the book Band Of Brothers. WWII fascinates me to no extent. His school has the only High School WWII class in the nation. All other WWII classes are college level, and only 11 students per year get to take it. So, he's lucky and I want to be in that class.

Later on we started talking about various camps we've been at or been counselors at. The subject of camp games came up and I was reminded of the game Silent Football. Silent Football is one of those games that sounds so stupid when you first hear about it but is one of the funnest games I have ever played. It's a Gentlemens game that boasts using politeness and punishment. This game is for Gentlemen only, so if you happen to be of the female, please skip this next part because I'm about to explain the rules here.

Ground Rules: This Is A Gentlemens Game.

1: NEVER tell a woman about this game.
2: Always refer to the leader of the game as Mr. Commisioner.
3: Always refer to the other players by their last name preceded by Mr.
4: Everyone must remain silent unless pointing out a mistake to Mr. Commisioner.

Moves Of The Game:

1:Thwack: The most simple move, it's a slap on the thigh in the direction you want to pass the ball, the ball moves only one person.
2:Pass: Raise an arm in the direction you want to pass the ball, the ball skips the person closest to you and goes to the next.
3: Shrug: The move is as it suggest, it sends the ball directly back where it came from.
4: Schmoedum: Bring your arm up to your face and point your elbow at the person you want to send the ball to, the move sends the ball directly to that person.

Rules Of The Moves:

1: Never Thwack the third Thwack, you will be punished.
2: Never do the same move three times in a row.
3: NEVER SHRUG A SCHMOEDUM! this is the second worst thing you can do, just behind telling a woman.

Punishments:

The punishments are basically made up by Mr. Commisioner. There are a few suggestions that Iwould like to make though. Always keep rubber bands at hand, they are very useful in this game. The Axehandle, put hands together and slam them down in a giant fist on the offenders spine. Purple Nurples are always great. Further on, make the punishments worse and worse. In the games I played, they went as far as to pull nipple hair out.

Try this game, it might be a little weird at first and you definately have to find the righ people to play it, but it's still the most fun game ever.

I Hate Being Dropped

I was trying to play Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter with a few friends tonight but I kept getting dropped from the server. Kojubat was hosting the game. I have decided that he can't support players from the west coast at all. My friend from Longview (neighboring town) JaWib was in the game and he was dropped every time as well. I was dropped from the game a total of 5 times. I must say that I do have a better connection than Kojubat, cause I can support 16 gamers without lag. I tried to create a room, but he wouldn't join it and bring everyone else, so I got frustrated and stopped playing for the evening.

Another Day, Another Dollar. For being late to work.

Well, I spent most of my day today working, which I was almost an hour late for. The reason for that starts last night.

I was at home on my laptop talking to my friend Carol at 10:30 when she invited me to go shoot pool at the Triangle Bowl, which is competition with the bowling alley I work at, The Hilander. So, I decided to go with them, not realizing untill we arrived that I was still wearing my work shirt, that had a THE HILANDER blazened across the back of it. This is not so good, since the owner of the Triangle was fired from the Hilander when the owner of the Hilander found out that he bought it. Anywho, I was walking around the bowling alley talking to some people I know, when the owner of the Triangle started over the loudspeaker, "Hey Hilander Boy! You're in the wrong building!" All I could do is turn around and wave at him and say Hi, cause I used to work with him. I walked over to him later and told him I would trade the shirt I was wearing for one of the triangle shirts they had for sale, he denied it and told me he would rather burn the shirt.

So, we shot pool for a while and I recieved a sever beating. I flirted with the snackbar attendant for a while and talked to some other teenagers there till about 12:20. We left the triangle and went drove around for a while to find a house that there was supposedly a party at. I had the number of the person so we called them and went to the house. We went downstairs to find a friend of mine laying in bed with a girl that's in my 6th period. That meant that my friend had just lost his V-card! YAY FOR HIM! Well, all of us sat around for a while till one of my friends got mad at me for talking about being high, and said that I shouldn't talk about being high unless I was going to get them high, so I did. I ended up staying there just listening to music untill 4 am, when I decided to walk home. I actually just live around the corner from the house, so it was alright. I woke up at 10:00 am, which is when I wanted to wake up, but I fell back to sleep. I ended up waking at 11:30, a half hour after I was supposed to be there, when my brother in law came into my room and asked if I worked today. I told him I did and he then informed me that my work had called... and that I was late. That was my second time this month that I was late, and my boss made sure to inform me of that. I got a verbal warning, and a joke from my manager. Overall, a good time.

Obligatory First Post

Everyone seems to have a blog, since I seem to enjoy being the best at the things I do, I decided to make one too.

Anywho, I've been thinking about the trip to Europe I'm going to make toward the end of this summer, and It's getting more and more appealing every day. My only worry right at this point is that I won't be able to charge my iPod whilst there. I know I'll have the money to get there and live somewhat comfortably, but I don't think I could go a month without listening to Tool, which is my favorite band by the way.

My love for the band has been fueled even more since I heard of the release of their 6th album, 10,000 days. I'm really really excited about this. I've actually been doing research into the band and finding out the names of unreleased songs and trying to download them. I've found quite a few songs that either are all Tool, or has part of the band in it, mostly the singer, Maynard James Keenan. One of the songs is a duet with Maynard singing a song with Tori Amos at one of her concerts. I'm not a fan of her, to be honest I've never really heard her at all, but I'm really starting to like this song a lot.

I'm going to figure out the rest of this blog page now. I'll post more at a later date.

PEACE!